One of my favourite songs by Christian rapper Lecrae is the song "Boasting" from his 2010 album Rehab. In it, there's a line that never fails to hit me. He says around the middle of the second verse:

I rejected his love, grace, kindness, and mercy.
Dying of thirst, yet, willing to die thirsty.

I love that line because I think it so poignantly speaks on the internal dilemma, the struggle of the unwillingness to repent.

Lately, I have been feeling the ramifications of this, and what it feels like to be spiritually parched.

I don't know what it is about our sickening human nature that makes us voluntarily (or involuntarily) reject the one thing that's good for us.

I don’t know why or even how, but I have been admittedly feeling a growing distance between me and God these past couple months.

I realised this when there was a lack of the fruit of the Spirit and a growing attitude shift towards the negative or cynical thoughts regarding people, situations or myself.

Somehow, without even realising it, I ended up in a place where I struggled to fuel myself with this life-giving water.

But He has been patient with me, this stubborn child of his, and never stopped trying to get my attention as I try to refocus.

His patience and mercy are bountiful and more than I can ever ask for.

Thank God that He doesn’t give up on his children.

I have to admit that when someone flat-out rejects the gospel after being presented numerous times with overwhelming evidence of its validity if they still honestly believe that it is false or if they are unwilling to admit to its truth.